Tuesday, November 23, 2004


the teacher was absent & the sub didn't know anything so i read a bit (this anthology of fiction/poetry/essays on tattooing & tattoos), worked on my sculpture a bit (this 'found object' thing i'm doing for class) & went home. after improvising a lunch i figured i could do this rather than try to get some sleep (after all, i actually managed 5 hours last night rather than my now-usual 3) -- "this" being a chain letter/q & a printed in thieves & kings #45 (a really good comic -- ie: no steriod-freaks-in-tights or women with heads smaller than their tits -- by mark oakley). this makes for a decent 'self discovery' type excercise, & you, my Hypothetical Audience, feel free to get drunk & do this too.
here goes...

1. first name
(well, it's actually jane in real life but i don't look like a jane...i guess i'll probably get it officially changed)

2.do you wish on stars?
i don't wish for things: the waiting would kill me
3.when did you last cry?
about 2 days ago when i jabbed myself in the eye by accident, or maybe that doesn't count?
4.do you like your handwriting?
i love it because it is illegible. i've had classmates ask me ,in all seriousness, what language i was taking my notes in.it's been compared to any number of middle-eastern languages & even LOTR-elf-writing.i have a more conventional version for writing things that actually have to be read by other people
5.what is your favourite meat?
(bring on the sausage jokes!!!)
venison or quail -- 'gator is disgustingly oily

6.most embarassing cd?
marilyn manson's smells like children, because he's the sort of musician 'someone like me' ought to like but it turns out i don't like the predictability of "mainstream-alternative":he already has enough/too many fans to need me to buy his cds
7.if you were another person, would you be friends with you?
i wouldn't know. on one hand, i'm pretty much asocial, but, i'm also pretty damn stubborn about championing lost causes...

8.are you a daredevil?
i act on any (within certain perameters) thought that enters my mind & have consequently done some inexplicable things
9.have you ever told a secret you swore you wouldn't tell?
no. i still have secrets left by people who probably don't remember me, it's been that long
10.do looks matter?
at first. but they can't keep my attention
11.how do you release anger?
in extreme instances, i trash my room; the putting-back-together calms me down
12.where is your second home?
a big lump of concrete/searchlight-base outside the police station on the harbourfront: i sit on the outermost edge overlooking the water(there's a almost-2 metre drop) for thinking/writing/staring at the waves; there's also a chip cart within walking distance most days & they have mayonnaise along with the regulatory ketchup
13.do you trust others easily?
nope. i'm fairly paranoid -- back in elementary school, when i still "hung out" with people, i didn't let my best aquaintences (i don't say 'friend' because, to me, a Friend would be someone you'd at least donate an organ to, if not downright,literally, die for. no wonder i don't have friends) know where i lived until i knew them for 2 whole years
14.what was your favourite toy as a child?
plastic dinosaurs & model cars; i didn't get a barbie 'til i was too old for dolls
15.what class in school do you think is totally useless?
accounting, math, law, phys-ed(or @ least the team sports portion). basically anything i didn't/still don't like, though for the most part it depends on the teacher -- religion was actually more intresting (i did a poster on the kama sutra for an assignment) than philosophy (the teacher -- who had horrible taste in clothes -- insisted on the existence of "God" & would get pissed off at any attempts at debate)
16.do you have a journal?
i'll write on anything, my arm if i don't have paper but have an idea (i always carry a pen or marker in my bag)
17.do you use sarcasm?
on my good days i thrive on it
18.what do you look for in a guy/girl?
someone with an aversion to shopping malls/strong perfume/pop music, a love for art/literature/weird food/second-hand cds, someone who never talks without saying something, someone more optimistic than i am. must also like long, pointless walks in the middle of the night, someone with similar -- but never identical -- intrests/opinions/whatever
boy does that sound like a 'personals' ad...

19.what's your favourite ice cream flavour?
hazelnut gelato made from scratch. with brown sugar-crystals on top, preferably eaten outside on a cold-ish day so it won't melt so fast
20.what are your favourite colours?
black,green,& silver. blues & purples are nice sometimes too
21.what are you listening to right now?
d generation's no lunch cd (any band that screams "... the television wants to SCREW me" as part of a song has to be good!)
22.last thing you ate?
a couple of days-old chicken balls with plum sauce, a peanut butter & ham (that's not a typo) sandwich, all the soy milk in the fridge, & a banana.
23.last person you talked to on the phone?
as i try to avoid the phone as much as possible, probably my mom
24.the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
hey, what about the same sex, eh? not everyone is straight! but yeah, i'm not sure: sometimes it's smell, how the light falls on him/her, the pattern on a shirt...i think it's completely random. i mean, i still remember some guy with jellybean-shaped eyebrows who grinned (a little crazily) at me for no reason from several years ago (the whole train trip we just stared across @ each other. weird. and neat, too.)i'll figure it out one day
25.favourite sports?
team sports are evil. i'd like to learn fencing one day, though
26.favourite food?
absinthe-infused chocolates. or hand cut fries with malt vinegar, pepper, mayonnaise, olives, onions, & relish -- everything except salt or ketchup -- because it's Different
27.last movie you watched?
the great dictator (the charlie chaplin film where chaplin makes fun of hitler & nazis in general. long live black & white movies!)
28.favourite day of the year?
i don't keep track of my life on some Cosmic Scorecard...
29.scary movies or happy endings?
all true Endings should be bittersweet. oh. you mean film. scary movies that end happily
30.favourite season?
if you asked me in summer, i'd have said winter. if you asked me in winter, i'd have said summer. but now... spring going into summer?
31.relationships or one night stands?
i'm un/lucky enough to have never had to have thought about the question. ideally, i'd say relationships because if i make the effort to (ahem) connect with someone, anyone, they shouldn't be of the disposable, one-time-only variety
32.what books are you reading?
i'm currently reading a whole wad of things: books on every aspect of tattooing imaginable (from coffee table glossies to uber-acedemic treatises on tattooed women), fairy tales, dylan thomas, non-'superhero' comics (thieves & kings, poison elves, johnny the homicidal maniac, blue monday, i'm also working my way through a foot-tall stack of bargain bin comics i picked up for a quarter each), a book on criminal psychology, & some stuff for school
33.what's on your mouse pad?
a grotty, formerly beige, thing that came from a box labled "valu mouse". (i bought it for 7 bucks so maybe that's why)
34.favourite board game?
35.what did you watch on tv last night?
i do not worship your god, this deity you call "tv" is irrelevant to my well being... (actually, the habit never started because my parents never saw fit to install cable; how my sisters manage several hours of public television nightly is beyond my scope of comprehension) i miss out on a lot of conversations though
36.what was your first pet's name?
my family barely trusts me with plants -- i only have ones that can be forgotten-about for weeks on end & it's never ocurred for me to name my cacti
37.favourite smells?
burning paper, the aftermath of a party, wet leaves, the immediate area around a pizza place, squished cherries, clean sweat, leather jackets, iron, old forgotten books, my bed, i can't think of any more but one -- the lake but only because i don't know what ocean smells like


that took me several hours to type (there was an interlude where i had to help my sister look up stuff on hitler for some project or other, plus, i just type slow)so now i'm gonna go eat dinner. probably another peanut butter & ham sandwich.

no clever sign-off

Monday, November 15, 2004

if you care to know

released a couple of my reject cds into the wilds of downtown toronto on saturday. including a single by usher -- i do NOT like usher but got that cd free in a goodie bag when i was volunteering for nxne. thought i should clear that up,

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

nothingness is existence

in school with nothing to do. but these 'blog' thingies are supposed to be sort of mundane, right? it's raining outside & i have water in my boots. i learned about 'sex bracelets' from my sister a couple of days ago -- kids these days, eh? apparently my rubber bracelets mean i'm into hardcore,,,
that's all folks,

oh yeah, election day in america today. it's making headlines in the 'papers here in canada; does the average american know who our prime minister is?

i'm gonna go walking in the rain...